Same Crime: Michael Vick – 23 months | Mike Huckabee’s son David – 0 months

Via Show Me Progress blog.

Dogster noted that

It turns out that David Huckabee, the then Governor of Arkansas’s son, hung and murdered a stray dog while Huckabee was at a Boy Scout Camp. Guess what? No charges were filed even though there were witnesses and Huckabee was dismissed from the camp because he failed to live up to the Boy Scout creed of “Scouts are kind.”

Published in the Arkansas Democrat-Gazette 8/7/98:

Governor’s son 1 of 2; fired at Scout camp; after stray dog killed

ELIZABETH McFARLAND, ARKANSAS DEMOCRAT-GAZETTE

The younger son of Gov. Mike Huckabee and another teen were fired last month from jobs at a Boy Scout camp after the killing of a stray dog.

Marcal Young of Texarkana, scout executive of the Caddo Area Council that operates the camp where the dog was killed, said this week that two boys violated a Scout law, “A Scout is kind.”

Young would not release the names of the boys nor explain how the dog, “probably a mixed breed,” was killed.

The two teens reported the event immediately and said they had made a mistake.
“They felt it [the dog] was ill and what have you, still our policy is it was inappropriate behavior,” Young said.

He would not say what the boys thought was wrong with the dog, but he said they did not suspect rabies.

Members of the camp staff receive training before camp starts and are told what it means to be “a good role model,” Young said.

An anonymous, unconfirmed report describing a particular process of killing the dog and naming young Huckabee as a participant was sent by fax machine this week by an organization against cruelty to animals to the Arkansas Democrat-Gazette. That report was described by Young and the governor as inaccurate.

Both men declined to say how the dog had been killed or who did it.

The dog was killed July 11 at Camp Pioneer near Hatfield. Only employees witnessed the incident. Not many of them were on hand, one source said.

Young said he chose not to reveal the names of the employees because “I just think that they’re due privacy. These are young people. They make mistakes occasionally, but I’m not covering for them.”

Young said the council’s board gives him the authority to take care of personnel decisions. He said the council believes it took appropriate action and the matter is closed. He said he did not report it to law enforcement authorities.

A source who asked to remain unnamed said David Huckabee, who turned 18 on July 22 and was 17 at the time of the incident, was one of those fired over it.

A reporter’s message left at the Governor’s Mansion for David Huckabee was not returned.

Danny Frady of Texarkana said his son, Clayton, 19, was the other staff member who was fired.

The elder Frady said his son told him he came upon one or more Scouts who had the dog “hung over a limb and choking” so the younger Frady helped “put it out of its misery.”

“I think the boy has paid his dues because he lost his job. He was one of the better counselors. He’s made a mistake, and he’s paid for it,” Danny Frady said. “I don’t think he did anything wrong to put an animal out of its misery.”

Danny Frady said killing a stray dog that has become a nuisance is common in rural areas. The mistake was doing it in front of other youth staff members, Frady said.

Young said the fired employees might be required to undergo counseling if they applied to be employees again. Danny Frady said he doesn’t think his son needs counseling because “he’s not cruel to animals.”

Polk County Sheriff Mike Oglesby said neither he nor his deputies had heard of the incident. A complaint should have been made, he said.

Prosecuting Attorney Tim Williamson of Mena said cruelty to animals is a Class A misdemeanor, punishable by up to a $ 1,000 fine and up to a year in jail. “We regularly charge cruelty to animals. That’s kind of my pet peeve,” he said.

Oglesby and Williamson said they didn’t intend to investigate because no one had lodged a complaint.

Camp Pioneer in Polk County served 2,026 campers for week-long stints from May 31 through July 25.

The camp employed 65 staff members. Caddo Area Council includes eight Arkansas counties and two Texas counties.

Why do Republicans hate God’s creations? They hate our children. They hate our country. They hate our troops. They’re lawless, they’re immoral and they’re corrupt. …and they’re in our way to a better world! And now I’m reading that they’ll kill stray dogs so their kids can be entertained?!

The Republicans have become like… “A plague” on the human race!!

Little OtisOur dog’s name is Little Otis, pictured here. He was born in the wild as a Hurrican Katrina survivor. He was found, along with his litter-sister, nursing from his mother who was laying dead along the road in southern Mississippi.

Lucky for Little Otis, he wasn’t found by a Republican sleaze-ball like David Huckabee.

Thoughts about Michele Bachmann and Adolf Hitler

mexican fruit fliesAs you may already know, I have made a few statements about my feelings toward Congresswoman Michele Bachmann (R-MN 6th CD) and the rest of her ilk in relation to their homophobia towards gay and lesbian folk. Many of you have made these wild and crazy accusations of what I have said about her. While others have taken what I’ve said wildly out of context.houseflyThis is wrong and each of you should be ashamed of yourself. (Not really…I’m just kidding.)

I have found a way to rectify the situation: I decided to fire my former Chief of Staff. I needed a Chief of Staff who knew how to articulate exactly how I felt about Congresswoman Bachmann over the past year and her tenure as a state senator. Consequently, I’ve hired Ms. Joolee Kwist to be my new Chief of Staff and I’ve asked her to produce a few press statements. Hopefully, this will help understand exactly how I feel about Congresswoman Bachmann and her feelings of hatred towards the GLBT community.

Please remember that if you’re looking for further clarification of my views, you will need to be in contact with my Chief from now on.

Joolee Kwist’s first statement to the public:cockroach

As I stated earlier, in spite of the offense you take at what the Fruit Fly says and believes, you need to be accurate in your accusations, because many people do distinguish between saying a person is “from Hitler” or identifying homophobia as “from Hitler.”

The Fly said, as you quote, “It’s part of Hitler I think to say that this is “homophobic”. It’s anything but homophobic.”

Those words do not say that Bachmann is Hitler, nor do any of the other numerous quotes that you posted.

Hitler, however, is the father of Homophobia.

Joolee Kwist

HUGE improvement from my former Chief of Staff, don’t you think?!

HUGE!Black Garbage Fly

Most articulate in her word-choic… Well, I don’t need to prattle on. Christ knows, if I brag about her being able to exact my feelings about Congresswoman Bachmann’s homophobic attitudes towards gay people, she’ll be expecting a pay raise or something.

I don’t know about you…but I think Kwist is fuckin’ brilliant.

Here’s Ms. Kwist’s second Press Release. It’s even better than her first one. I hope you like it.

I want to set the record “straight” on Fruit Fly’s comments at the 2004 FlyWatch conference that you referred to here. Go back and listen to that again, and you will find that “the Fly” does not say that “being homophobic is like being ‘part of Hitler.’ I have the same tape you have, whoever you are… What Fly is discussing there is the terminology of “homophobia” being used to describe people who are assholes and hate gay people. The Fruit Fly says that the description of hatred-of-gays is “homophobic”, and that hatred is what comes from Hitler.

Get the difference? Homophobes are not from Hitler. Hitler, however, is the father of homophobia.

You may find both statements equally offensive. You need to be accurate, however, in your accusations, because many people do distinguish between saying a person is “from Hitler” or identifying homophobia as “from Hitler.”

I know the Fruit Fly personally, and I will testify to you that “The Fly” harbors no hatred toward Congresswoman Bachmann or to others with whom The Fly has deep differences. Far from it. The Fruit Fly would not make a statement that she or any others with whom she associates are “from Hitler,” much as The Fly would dispute your actions and ideas.

Joolee Kwistmosquito

She’s a treasure, ain’t she?! I mean, how brilliant was all of that?!

If I had to pick, lessee…um, Emily Brontë, Robert Frost and um…Alfred Lord Tennyson or Kwist? Who would you pick? You’d pick Kwist, right? You know it would be Kwist, hands down, no shit. She’s the real-deal.

FruitFlySeriously. I could spend a lifetime looking for a talent like that. On one hand, we have that Writers Strike going on in Los Angeles and finding a good writer is already hard to come by. And here I bump into this little treasure… <sigh> She’s a Keeper!!!

Inspired by dumpBachmann’s latest.

Rudy Giuliani’s buddies begin showing up in jail

RudyBy way of Norwegianity, TPM Muckraker is running a story on a guy named Hank Asher who, it turns out ran cocaine out of Columbia into Florida back in 1980 and is a very close friend of Rudy…That is “Rotten Rudy” Giuliani.

“H.A.”, according to ABC, is Hank Asher, who did indeed own a data mining software company called Seisint at the time (more about that later). Asher himself is worth “north of $700 million,” based mostly on his success selling his data mining product, which is called Matrix (he’s since sold it to LexisNexis). And yes, he did smuggle cocaine from Colombia to Florida aboard his private jet for eight months in 1980 and 1981. But he says he paid his dues by cooperating with federal agents to stop other runners.

Hank AsherAsher appears in court in regards to an indictment against Orange County Sheriff Michael Carona on bribery charges.

Carona himself was once a rising star in the GOP, often mentioned as a potential candidate for lieutenant governor of California. Dubbed “America’s Sheriff” by Larry King for how he handled the 2002 hunt for 5-year-old Samantha Runnion’s kidnapper, he naturally endorsed America’s Mayor Rudy Giuliani for president. According to news accounts, he’s met Giuliani at least twice. He’s also chums with Bernie Kerik.

The base of the indictment? Here:Republican Elephant

The indictment alleges that Carona and five associates, including his wife (Deborah) and mistress (named Debra), accepted bribes and generally did what they could to get rich off Carona’s position ($700,000 in bribes and kickbacks).

Ahhhhh… Of course. Why would I think there wasn’t a “wench hiding in the pantry” for a story like this one? They’re all Republicans, so I should have known. Carona also had his top-aide, George Jaramillo’s sister-in-law, Erica Lynne Hill as his “snack on the side“.erica hill

“Mike [Carona] has betrayed George and me,” Hill said at the time. “He’s not a faithful person to any of his women, but I don’t want to publicly embarrass him now. He has a wife and a son. I just want everyone to get on with their lives.”

Jaramillo has been fired and indicted on the same line of charges, but Carona told a bunch of detectives in 2004 that he caught Erica Hill and Jaramillo having sex. Yeah, that’s Jaramillo riding the hobby-horse with his sister-in-law. Even though she denies the allegation, she did reveal to a grand jury that as a 15 year old, Jaramillo had molested her repeatedly who is 11 years older than she is.

What bothers Hill most now is Carona’s campaign to paint her as a woman prone to hurl wild, unfounded accusations. She wants the public to know she wasn’t the person who used his power to win sexual favors and then lie about it; she didn’t twice leak sex stories that have tainted her own image as well as Carona’s reputation as a “conservative Christian.” She is, in fact, the person who told me everything and then asked me not to reveal it—for fear that it would destroy Carona.nelson muntz

HAHAHAHHAH!! He’s a “conservative Christian.” What does that mean anymore?

According to grand jury records, Hill consented to Carona’s advances. The sex allegedly occurred in the sheriff’s truck, at his campaign offices, in his home and—as his unsuspecting son and wife stood nearby—in a hotel suite during his first inaugural party in 1999.

The Orange County Register has more on this story. Carona filed his “Not Guilty” plea on Nov 5 and his court date is on 12/18/2007.

The story is filled with lots of bling too. For example, Hank Asher shows up at Carmine’s in NYC and throws $100 bills at restaurant carolers, gives away two $15,000 Cartier gold watches, and apologizes to all of the guests at the restaurant for his boisterous party by picking up all of their dinner tabs on his black Amex.

Rizzolo and caronaHowever, the best website on this story is from the Laguna Journal. You’ll find tons of mugshot photos of the players, links connecting Hank Asher and Michael Carona to strip-club owners in Las Vegas who donated cash to Carona’s campaign.

According to Open Secrets,

Sheriff Michael Carona gave $1,000 to Republican Dana Rohrabacher (R-Huntington Beach) in 2004 and $1,000 to George W Bush.

“Henry” (Hank) Asher gave $950 to the National Republican Senatorial Committee in 1993.

Congressman Rohrabacher is all tangled up in this case against Carona as well. Jeffery Ray Nielson, a conservative political activist and associate of Rohrabacher, pleaded guilty to multiple felony of lewd acts with a 14 -year old boy and a 15 year old, even though Rohrabacher was stricken with a sever case of amnesia. Steven Maglivio of the California Majority Report says:

In 2006, Carona barely won the GOP endorsement for re-election as Sheriff. U.S. Rep. Dana Rohrabacher, who praised Carona’s efforts to combat illegal immigration, helped put Carona over the top, and he won re-election.

You can watch a counter-campaign television ad by clicking here. Ralph Martin ran against Carona last year. He lost because Carona’s face is still on OCSD’s main website. Pretty rediculus considering Carona’s been stripped of his (Law Enforcement) National Security Clearance.

“The GOP is “Family Values” party in America!!” “Gays and lesbians are a “danger” to the American family!!” “Gay marriage threatens the ‘holy sanctity’ of marriage!” “The Republican party is the ‘Christian party’.” “RepublicansFruitFly understand and care for and will fight for the American family.”

Isn’t it nice? Isn’t it really nice to know that you’re *NOT* a Republican? Because if you were, you would have to identify with scum like these people!

Huckabee Threatens Civilization

Actually, I lied in the title. The real title of today’s Special is:

Huckabee warns gay marriage threatens civilizationSt Huck

Mike Huckabee has already begun to ramp-up the Konservative Kristian Koalition rhetoric with his “Let’s Hate The Gay Families” crap. Now that he’s attracted the attention of the religiously insane, a.k.a. “The Xtians” in his bid for GOP Presidency.

Leave it to the Evangelicals to suck off the scum that settles to the bottom.

Said the Governor:

“You have to have a basic family structure. There’s never been a civilization that has rewritten what marriage and family means and survived.”

Really?! Is that true? Really? Or is that just another religious jihadist tub thumping stupid rhetoric with a penchant for pretending that he’s an “expert” on something while secretly hoping nobody discovers he’s actually a complete buffoon?

…Ooooo!! Here’s a tidbit of “re-writing” the concept of marriage what the word “family” means; Divorce Rate America!! According to them:

According to enrichment journal on the divorce rate in America:
The divorce rate in America for first marriage is 41%
The divorce rate in America for second marriage is 60%
The divorce rate in America for third marriage is 73%

Now there’s some re-writing of the definition of “marriage” and “family values”!! I sure hope our civilization survives with all of that “re-writing” of marriage and families in divorce courts everywhere!

Huckleberry continues nonchalantly:Huckleberry Hound

“So there is a sense in which, you know, it’s one thing to say if people want to live a different way, that’s their business. But when you want to redefine what family means or what marriage means, then that’s an issue that should require some serious and significant debate in the public square.”

So, if you want to commit adultery or have children out of wedlock, or even pay your male prostitute extra so he’ll pick up some really high grade methamphetamine for your next visit, you can do so in private. But… if I want to be able to legally marry my life-partner, that requires a “serious” and “significant” debate in the public square?!

You know… What seriously needs to be discussed in the public square with some very significant debate is: Why did Governor Mike Huckabee encourage an Arkansas parole board to release serial rapist Wayne Dumond? …Even after several of his victims urged him to move on and ignore the predator! Because after if ever there was an attempt to destroy civilization, it’s when crazed maniacal politicians let bat-shit crazy people out of jail who run out and kill other peoples’ mommies after violently raping them.

huckleberry hound 2He babbles on by proving that he’s full of shit…

Huckabee scoffed at the claim that gay couples need legal recognition to visit one another in hospitals and nursing homes, saying that was achievable through power of attorney documents.

Gov. Mike Huckabee lives in a clueless world. Let me tellya…he’s an idiot. No really, he’s nothing but an idiot. Seriously, he’s an idiot. I’m not kidding! He’s a big fat idiot!

If he had a brain, he’d take the time out to read HRC’s 2007 Healthcare Equality Index. The PDF discusses at length the problems and the successes of GLBT couples involved with hospitalization. But he won’t. He’s far too busy stumping for votes for spiritually-dead voters who’ve been brainwashed in thinking that God hates “the Gays”. (If you encounter these kinds of people, please don’t draw any attention to their What Would Jesus Do?” bracelet… It only makes them nervous and feel a tiny pin-prick of hypocrisy.)

While he’s out there babbling his hatred for gays, gay marriage and the mythical destruction of institutions such as marriage and family… Check out Huckleberry in Des Moines on Tuesday in a conversation about the newly released NIE report that was released the day before.

Kuhn: I don’t know to what extent you have been briefed or been able to take a look at the NIE report that came out yesterday …

Huckabee: I’m sorry?

Kuhn: The NIE report, the National Intelligence Estimate on Iran. Have you been briefed or been able to take a look at it —

Huckabee: No.

Kuhn: Have you heard of the finding?

Huckabee: No.

Kuhn then summarized the NIE finding that Iran had stopped work on a clandestine nuclear program four years ago.

SheepleYup! There’s one very proud candidate to represent sheeple of our society. They’ll follow after drug addicts, suck on the teat of Jewish homophobes, they’ll even hand their children over to pompous religious zealots who will teach them to huddle around cardboard cutouts of George W. Bush and pray they’ll be chosen to go to war for him. Huckleberry will gladly hate the gays and remain clueless on the most recent current events.

It appears that he’s a perfect candidate for the religiously insane!

So where’s the threat to the American family? Is the threat coming from a gay couple who lives at the other end of your block? Perhaps the threat is coming from that lesbian couple who came to visit your church last Sunday?! Perhaps the true threat to civilization is a religious idiot fromFruitFly 6 Arkansas who’s hoping to be the next President of the United States and so he can prove to you how much God hates all of us because we’re not “perfect like him”.

I’m just sayin’.

Found in the Dumpster

New Aussie Prime Minister eats his own earwaxVoting Dumpster

Hey… Quit grossing out about the fact. At least we know he still hates Bush. (In the non-gay sort of way.) And since conservative John Howard’s administration is now defunct, there’s a new push to renew the same-sex marriage laws. With that in play, I’ll even invite the “Earwax Yum-Yum” guy to my own same-sex wedding.

Stupid celebrities too drunk to be considered “celebrities” in the future

Britney Spears hires a driver for her own habitual drinking-n-driving. That dude, shortly afterwards quits and says; “even in the back of the limo, she’s still a liability“. Does everybody remember when Britney was sober and acted like a Republican by saying stupidly:

“Honestly, I think we should just trust our president in every decision that he makes and we should just support that…”

The remaining two transgendered members of HRC’s Board of Directors have resigned walked out

HRC (Human Rights Campaign) people had to weigh in between two evils with the ENDA bill as it passed through Congress: Getting some legislation passed without including the transgenered community in exchange of getting nothing passed at all.mosquito

Now we all know an unexpected truth: the Human Rights Campaign is only interested in some humans. But certainly not all of them. One could hardly blame Donna Rose and Jamison Greene.

I’m so old, I remember Marlon Riggs’ film Tongues Untied from 1991. Riggs’ film taught us about discrimination against gay people and how hypocritical it is when gay people discriminate against their own. In his case, against African-American gays and lesbians. Sixteen years later and one less Marlon Riggs in our midst and we’re still discriminating against our own!

Black Garbage FlyWe Are the World” retooled into a GLBT hate song by the “God Hates Fags” people

I think it’s fantastic, personally. Especially when you get to the parts where these Republican hags come to a chorus and start talking about eating our children. I’m guessing most of them are Mike Huckabee voters and a few of them are Ron Paul supporters. I could be wrong, but I’m sure I spotted Michele Bachmann somewhere past 2:23 into the middle of it. Her husband was behind the camera carrying his her purse.

US Presidential Democratic hopeful Mike Gravel does a great rap-tune

Up yours Puffy! Screw you Usher! “Bite me” Snoop! Y’all can’t hang with my boy Mike G when he’s hangin’ in the crib with his homeys!

Domain Registered company “Go Daddy dot Com” funds Larry Craig ads

Cheerleaders, hot blondes, pom-pom girls, it’s all about funding the upcoming NFL Super Bowl and Go Daddy dot com had to make a decision. They’ve decided to parody Larry Craig’s potty-behavior and have loads of fun with the idea, inspite of their konservative korporate kounterparts who are objecting to the marketing plans.

Bob Parsons, Go Daddy chief executive officer, announced the company’s advertising intentions in his blog Tuesday. He had blogged in August that the company was considering spending on other opportunities, citing the success of its Indianapolis 500 broadcast sponsorship.

But Go Daddy’s share of the domain-name market went from 16 percent before its 2005 Super Bowl ad to 25 percent in weeks and months after the game, Parsons said. Market share rose further to 32 percent after the 2006 ad and now stands at 42 percent, he said.

“If you look at the historical payoff, we came to the conclusion we can’t afford not to do it,” he said Tuesday in explaining the decision to buy at least one Super Bowl spot.

…that reminds me. I have a doman with GoDaddy I have to re-register and soon!!

Brigadier General Keith Kerr challenges the GOP Debates on Don’t Ask / Don’t Tellhousefly

It’s obvious the “gay-military” issue is a boondoggle for the Republican party. They championed this bill under Clinton and tried to screw him with it and now it’s coming home to roost.

In today’s world, the GOP dives for cover under the United States military for advice on the issue as an excuse.

Republican Presidential Panty-Waist: “OH GAWD! I dunno? Gays and Lesbians handling the file cabinets? Oh crap!! I mean… They’re the ones who will have to decide to respect a fellow-American who’s in charge of “civil-engineering” the US military base’s commissary produce contracts!!

Watch Mitt Romney get booed. Watch John McCain salute the General!!

But best of all; watch Anderson Cooper recover after CNN staffers screw up the General’s microphone and his original message become obsolete within a matter of seconds.

Suburban Mom tells it like it should beFruitFly 6

Mrs. Hughes will discuss her son Scooter, Howard be Thy name and feeling personally responsible for Global Warming because of her own personal hot flashes.

What’s my blog rating?!

I first saw this on Tilde‘s blog site who got rated “R”. I really didn’t understand what was going on with this, so I clicked through there and ended up at Gisleson’s Norwegianity who thinks the word “fucking” is highly under-representated. (I would agree, btw.)

Now I figured it out! Duh!

So the breakdown is this:

“Potty mouth” Tilde’ gets a Rated “R”

  1. Death (3x)
  2. Bitch (2)
  3. Screwing (1)

Sorry m’Dear…but you’re blog is far to filthy for anybody to read. Please go to the Automatic Confessional and receive your penance.

Gisleson over at Norwegianity gets a “Rated NC-17

  1. Dead (7x)
  2. Porn (5x)
  3. Hell (4x)
  4. Fucking (3x)
  5. Crack (2x)
  6. Bastard (1x)

Well, I personally think that’s a FUCK of a lot worse than Potty-Mouth Tilde’. (Poor thing. She still has my sympathies.)

With a nervous hand on my mouse, I timidly placed my cursor over Gisleson’s NC-17 image. I quickly genuflected (even though I’m not even Catholic) and typed in my blog’s address.

<Please Jesus… Please Jesus…>

I get this:

NC-17

  1. Ass (4x)
  2. Hell (3x)
  3. Dick (2x)
  4. Queer (1x)

Something’s really askew with that whole thing. But at least I shouldn’t have to go to the Automatic Confessional. (If I were a Catholic…..maybe.)

In the end, Gisleson and I are really foul mouthed, while I’m just a dirty-down ratFruitFly 6 bastard and we get NC-17. Tilde gets slapped with Rated R and the worse she ever said was “bitch” and “screwing”. Maybe that “Rate Your Blog” site is run by the same people who are running the Automatic Confessional! Ya think?

Rudy Giuliani had NYPD walk his mistress’ dog

Hippy RudyAhhh, nice… Rudy’s finest, NYPD, apparently was in charge of walking his mistress’ dog.

Aides dismissed questions about Nathan’s security detail as old news, since it was reported in 2001 that the NYPD granted her full-time protection that year after an unspecified threat was allegedly made against her. The detail was approved by Giuliani pal Bernard Kerik.

At the time, it was not uncommon to see Nathan being chauffeured around the city in an undercover Dodge with two detectives, who sometimes even helped to walk her dog.

As for the tickets, Carbonetti said they were “a token of goodwill from the city.”

The expenses were all paid with a City Hall American Express card funded with money from mayoral office units that had nothing to do with travel or security.

mosquitoThere’s a fine candidate for President of the United States. These Republicans have produced the scum of their monkey barrel and they’re proud of each and everyone of them.

Josh Marshall has a clearer list:

The Shag Fund not only paid for the 11 tryst visits to Hamptons.

– It paid for hotel and other expenses for mayoral aides — in addition to the security detail — who also went with the mayor to the Hamptons on the tryst weekends.

Nathan’s NYPD-chauffeured tripshousefly (without Rudy) to visit her parents in Pennsylvania, 130 miles outside the city.

– NYPD detectives and city-owned undercover Dodge to drive Nathan around the city.

NYPD detectives and city-owned undercover Dodge to drive Nathan’s friends and family around the city even when she wasn’t in the car.

– NYPD security detail for Nathan, personally approved by Bernard Kerik.

NYPD cops to walk Nathan’s dog.FruitFly 6

Rudy’s buddy Bernard Kerik’s next court appearance will be on January 26th. Perfect timing for a whole slew of presidential primaries throughout the United States within the next four weeks following.

Mike Huckabee talks to God on his cell-phone

If you live in Minnesota, this is the best weekend to stay indoors and blog your narrow ass off. Which pretty well sums it up for me. (Except for the “narrow ass” part…because if you saw my ass, “narrow” isn’t an adjective you would use.)

Holy HuckFirst up: The former Arkansas governor <slash> Republican Presidential hopeful <slash> heavy metal rocker Mike Huckabee!!

What’s his gig? He talks to God on his cell phone and justifies the death penalty because Jesus never objected to it while the Son of God hung from the cross.

Huckabee interrupted his speech to the Republican Governors Association in 2004 to answer his cell phone. He proceeded to have a three-minute conversation with God about President Bush’s re-election:

We’re behind [Bush], yes, sir, we sure are. Yes, sir, we know you don’t take sides in the election. But, if you did, we kind of think you’d hang in there with us, Lord, we really do.

You can watch the video here.

Do you think God’s cell-phone carrier is better than the one Ihuckabee_douche have? I have Sprint. They totally suck! I hate those guys!! I’m betting God’s cell carrier gives Him unlimited text messaging too. Just because He’s..”GOD”, they were like: “Okay sure…we’ll throw in unlimited Text and give ya Email too.”

In January 1997 during a triple execution, Governor Mike Huckabee responded to a fellow Arkansas citizen who asked how his Christian teachings squared with his views regarding the death penalty while on the air with Arkansas Educational Television:

“Interestingly enough,” Huckabee allowed, “if there was ever an occasion for someone to have argued against the death penalty, I think Jesus could have done so on the cross and said, ‘This is an unjust punishment and I deserve clemency’.”

Yes indeed…The Son of God prayed for forgiveness of his executioners. And since the Savior didn’t say:

“OH MY GOD!! THIS TOTALLY SUCKS! GET ME OFF THIS THING!!”

…It’s glaringly obvious toFruitFly 6 me as well. Christ does support the killing of His children!!

I’m willing to bet that “capital punishment” thing has always put a mile on Jesus Christ’s face. The Son of God is up there right now whining: “Dang..!! When are they gonna kill another one?! I can’t wait much longer!!”

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