Say, Mr. Graham! Is this one of those “double standards” you’re talking about?!

Richard Cohen, of the Washington Post has decided that Michael Jackson’s tragic demise wasn’t a problem of political over-exposure for Governor Sanford. Within four weeks, two Republicans have been apologizing for failing to keeping their trousers zipped up in the sense of “Holy Sanctity of Marriage” and an additional Republican governor is stepping down with her own two-week notice complete with hip-waders and fish-nets.  Thankfully, super-star King of Pop-Legend, Michael Jackson has croaked.  This funeral has  over-shadowed the entire train-wreck of a political party in less than a month.

But Dick Cohen is quite comfortable with the situation.  He points to the recent “Quiting Becuase I’m Not a Quiter Governor Sara Palin (R-AK) resignation as trivial.  Governor Mark Sanford:  “Oh phhhhphphp…Big Deal… Get over it already!!

Almost as interesting as Palin is South Carolina Gov. Mark Sanford. Never mind his affair. These things happen. Concentrate instead on how he hid his affair — by disappearing and calling attention to himself. Note also that even before he somehow took the Appalachian Trail to Buenos Aires, he was renowned for rejecting federal stimulus money. Before that, as a congressman, he claimed to have forsaken a housing allowance — and a cot — and said, “I sleep on the floor of my office.” Most of us would consider this weird behavior. In the GOP, it was seen as presidential timber.

Okay, can you guess what’s wrong with this picture?

If you’re AWOL from your post as Governor,  and lie to the good folks of your state by telling them you’ve gone on a hiking trip, meanwhile you spend tax-payer dollars to fly to Argentina to boff your Argentinian Lolita…so what? These things happen. Additionally, if you sleep on a cot, and claim publicly that you really slept on the floor: Some folks might think you’re weird — But the GOP will think you’re Presidential Timber!

Insert a lame “I got a woodie” joke here.

Tim Graham, the director of media analysts over at the conservative Media Research Center is expressing relief over the recent tragic death of Michael Jackson on behalf of Governor Mark Sanford (R-SC).

You see, according to Graham; if it hadn’t been for the overwhelming media attention on Michael Jackson’s demise, poor Governor Sanford would have suffered a lot more needless media scrutiny than he already has received and doesn’t deserve at all, whatsoever.

How pedestrian can the GOP’s propaganda machine continue to be?

Graham laments his grief for Sanford’s unfortunate zipper-problem:

“If you took a Democratic Sanford, a Democratic governor having one mistress, they would all yawn over that,” he contends. “They would really not find that very interesting at all, and yet these people will find Republican mayors cheating as an interesting national story.”

Mayors?  There are Republican mayors out there skanking on their wives in addition to the boat loads of US Senators, Governors and Congress-Creatures?!  There are mayors that we don’t know about, Mr. Graham?!?

Here’s the martyrdom line-up for the public consumption: “It’s those horrible infidels over on the Left who are so willing to crucify those of us Righteous Righties. If those Liberal Lefties are caught…Well, nobody would care!  But if we’re caught.. “Oh horror…! Oh poor us!  Why do you persecute us so?!!”

Graham continues (weeping bitterly):

“They know that people like you and me are disgusted by a Mark Sanford — and they know that that guy will be toast. And they know that adultery is not going to hurt a liberal,” he adds. “When we discuss how the media behaves, we understand that the same people who are all making an enormous, big deal out of Mark Sanford thought that there was absolutely nothing wrong with what Bill Clinton did [while in office].

Graham says; “It’s a clear double-standard.”

How much lying are these conservatives allowed to get away with before they’re called on it? Furthermore, how much stupidity can the American public take from these jack-asses.

Even Rush Limbaugh admitted that “Mark Sanford couldn’t keep his trousers zipped up because it was Obama’s fault!”

Now they’re weeping because Michael Jackson didn’t croak soon enough to protect Sanford’s “Great Trouser Snake Escape”?!

These Republicans are cheating around on their spouses (breaking God’s “Holy Sanctity of Marriage”), and the Conservatives  will complain that it’s everybody else’s fault.  Or, they’ll whip out with: “We’ve got a Double-Standard Here, people!”   (They don’t want hate crimes legislation to protect the gays…But they’ll jump at the chance for a “don’t pick on a Republican” legislation in a New York Minute!

It’s pathetic!

It’s Weak!

Let’s try this one step at a time. Because Tim Graham is just out right lying to his readership with this whole “double-standard idea”.

Double Standard #1:

John Edwards (D) v. Sarah Palin (R)

When it was discovered that John Edwards had been having an affair on his wife, the entire GOP Propaganda Machine (a.k.a. Mainstream Media) gasped: “His career is over with! His career is finished!!! Oh, his dear poor wife!”

The story was originally spilled by none other than The National Enquirer.

Fox’s Hannity and Colmes did not hesitate to have Chris Kofinas, Edwards’ campaign manager on their show to drill him on the “horror”.

But, the National Enquirer also published a story about Sarah Palin who had skanked on her husband and cheated on him in an affair.

The GOP gasped in horror – but not at the fact that Palin’s career was as was apparently Edwards’.  They gasped that the National Enquirer would even print such an alleged malicious lie!

In fact, the GOP threatened lawsuits against the Enquirer for even considering publishing the idea that they’re Political Lolita from Alaska would be a skank in the first place.

Governor Palin’s political career wasn’t over like Edwards’ career was “over”. Quite the contrary! The GOP loves Sarah Palin! We don’t know why, we think she’s dumber than a pail of nails! But, then that only means Sarah Palin’s Fan Club is grouped together by some very stupid pails.

Say, Mr. Graham! Is this one of those “double standards” you’re talking about?!

Double Standard #2:

Jim McGreevey (D-NJ) v Larry Craig (R-ID)

When Governor McGreevey came out of the closet, he came flying out. He came out flying with a closet-full of boas; admitted to having an affair with another man. Governor McGreevey was gay. He immediately resigned.

Republican Media gasped in horror:  Not another Democrat with an infidelity problem?!

Yet, Senator Larry Craig was arrested for soliciting sex in the Mens Room restroom at the Twin Cities International Airport. Senator Craig bullied the police officer with his Senator ID badge, trying to intimidate the officer, but it didn’t work. A few months later, the Senator plead guilty to the charge.

But, what happened to the Senator for Not-Coming-Out?

Nothing!  He’s happily back at his office doing whatever it is that he does for his good citizens of Idaho!  It’s embarrassing for them.  But, there’s no consequences for his actions?  He plead guilty for soliciting sex in a men’s restroom and there’s nothing wrong with that?  What kind of GOPervert party is this anyway?

Say, Mr. Graham! Is this one of those “double standards” you’re talking about?!

Double Standard #3:

Eliot Spritzer (D-NY) v. David Vitter (R-LA)

Governor Spitzer (D-NY) was caught in a prostitution ring. He was kicked out of office immediately.   Boom! Out of a job!  Go away!

Senator David Vitter (R-LA) was caught in a prostitution ring and this is what he did.

He drags his wife Wendy out wearing a tight leopard-print dress and shouts into the microphone

I’M SORRY!!

…And he goes back to work.  Not a care in the world…  Nothing about the fact that he was getting wrapped in a diaper while tens of thousands of his fellow Louisianans were floating dead in the drink.

So, the Democrat bangs some prostitutes, he’s sent home with a report card full of F’s.  But if a Republican bangs a brothel full of prostitutes, he drags his wench-looking wife in front of the cameras and apologizes and he gets to go back to work?!

Say, Mr. Graham! Is this one of those “double standards” you’re talking about?!

Double Standard #4:

Rod Blagojevich (D-IL) v. Ted Stevens (R-AK)

This Governor of Illinois was arrested and charged with a wide-variety of corruption charges, including an attempt to acution off the US Senate seat that was vacated by then President-Elect Barack Obama.  Within weeks, the Illinois Legislature impeached the governor who went later to stand trial and eventually convicted.

Ted Stevens (R-AK) was charged and convicted on seven counts of corruptions charges.  Stevens plead innocent of the charges, he was brought in front of a jury and he was convicted, unanimously on each count. What happened?  He continued to run for US Senate.  In December, following the election, what happened?

You got it, Baby!  The United States Senate stood up and gave this convicted felon a standing ovation!

Governor Blagojevich didn’t get an applause.  He didn’t even get a trial until after he was impeached!  Both plead not-guilty but only the Republican got to go on and receive his homage while the Democrat was shunned and pulled out like a weed from an old lady’s  garden.

Say, Mr. Graham! Is this one of those “double standards” you’re talking about?!

There’s no truth to back-up what these conservatives are saying these days.  Their truth is their demise.  Because each time a Democrat goes down for some unscrupulous practice, they step down and the party becomes more united to try harder.   The Republicans, this isn’t the way they work.  Although they “claim” those “Good American Family Values”, they are values you and I are expected to uphold.  Their values are way off-base to the ones they preach.  And that’s one of the many reasons the GOP is not going to make it in the end.
The Fratllis - Chelsea Dagger

WBC To Protest “Fag” Michael Jackson Memorial

This is gonna rawk…

In case you’re unaware – Westboro Baptist Chuch is the “God Hates Fags” group out of Kansas.  fruitfly21The church as only 80-odd members, most of whom are related to Fred Phelps in some form or another.  Two, maybe three of his own children have disowned him, the remaining children are all lame-suck attorneys.

The game-plan is always the same for these douche-bags.  If anybody lays a finger on them – their attorneys are filing lawsuits against everybody – including the Jackson family and the Staples Center.

The answer to the situation is simple: Arrest these A-holes before some 200,000 Michael Jackson fans bear down on the entire group and give all of them a colonoscopy with one of their “God Hates Fags” signs.

Watching LAPD underestimate the furor these massive crowds are going to ventilate against this tiny little band of hate mongers would be sweet.  More than likely, none of them would survive to file their lawsuits and we’ll all be the better for it. The Limousines: Very Busy People I’m not going to advocate murdering these douchebags, although it would be deserved.  I’m just imagining the chaos that would result if someone isn’t paying attention.  Calling Michael Jackson a “Fag” following the Prop 8 aftermath just makes for some really bad mo-jo.

Pam gets the street-creds for spotting it.

TMZ Has Just Reported: Michael Jackson Has Just Died

TMZ is reporting that the King of Pop and just passed away from cardiac arrest. From TMZ:

“We’ve just learned Michael Jackson has died. He was 50.

Michael suffered a cardiac arrest earlier this afternoon at his Holmby Hills home and paramedics were unable to revive him. We’re told when paramedics arrived Jackson had no pulse and they never got a pulse back.

A source tells us Jackson was dead when paramedics arrived.

Once at the hospital, the staff tried to resuscitate him but he was completely unresponsive.

We’re told one of the staff members at Jackson’s home called 911.

La Toya ran in the hospital sobbing after Jackson was pronounced dead.

Michael is survived by three children: Michael Joseph Jackson, Jr., Paris Michael Katherine Jackson and Prince “Blanket” Michael Jackson II.”

Who would’ve thought that Elizabeth Taylor would outlive that husband too?

GOP Less Popular Than Dick (Cheney)

From Greg Sargent’s “Plum Line” who notes the latest poll from the NBS/WSJ Poll (PDF!):

The poll found that 26% of respondents have a very positive or somewhat positive view of Cheney, up eight points from April. Meanwhile, it found that the GOP overall is viewed very or somewhat positively by only 25%, down four points from April.

Wasn’t there a time when the only American more despised than Dick turned out to be Paris Hilton? In March 2006, the Washington Post noted that Cheney was polling at whopping 18% approval rating.  Comparing that level of dislike – the Post decided to note people in the news that had higher approvals.  Crunching the numbers, they found that Dick Cheney was:

  • Less popular than singer Michael Jackson , bedmate of little boys and world-class screwball. One in four Americans — 25 percent — told Gallup polltakers last June they were still Jackson fans after the onetime King of Pop was found not guilty of child molesting.
  • Less popular than former football star O.J. Simpson was after his arrest and trial for murdering his estranged wife and her companion. Three in 10 — 29 percent — of all Americans had a favorable view of Simpson in an October, 1995 Gallup poll.
  • Less popular with Americans than Joseph Stalin is with Russians. In 2003, fully 20 percent said Stalin, blamed for millions of deaths in the former Soviet Union during the 1930s and 1940s, was a “wise and humane” leader. Thirty-one percent also said they wouldn’t object if Uncle Joe came back to rule again, according to surveys conducted by Russian pollsters.
  • Much less popular than former Vice President Spiro Agnew in his final days in office. Forty-five percent approved of the job that Agnew was doing as President Richard Nixon’s veep in a Gallup Poll conducted in August 1973, little more than a month before Agnew resigned and pleaded no contest to a criminal tax evasion charge arising from a bribery investigation.
  • Far less popular than former New Jersey Gov. James McGreevey days after he announced in August 2004 that he had engaged in an extramarital affair with a man and would resign. His job approval rating bumped from 43 to 45 percent.
  • But take heart, Dick. About 35 percent of those interviewed by the CBS poll didn’t offer an opinion of you. Perhaps some of your supporters were shy. And other polls released later in the week pegged your popularity considerably higher.
  • Besides, even at 18 percent you’re not the least popular public figure in America. You’re slightly better liked than that fabulously blond and brainless party girl Paris Hilton. She was viewed favorably last June by 15 percent of the public, according to Gallup.

While the poll-numbers have changed – can we assume that the bubble-headed bimbo is more popular than the GOP?!

Pray tell – when does the GOP realize that they’re going the way of the pteredactyl and the Whig Party?!